avocado Phakrannacy

I opened my email, and apparently I have an alter ego by the name of avocado Phakrannacy. "Hi, avocado Phakrannacy!" was on the subject line. I mean, I've had this part of me that is high in Omega 3's and goes great with nachos, but to this point I never thought of her as a complete identity. Perhaps Avocado can be my shadow. Or me her's.

Envision it: Avocado at Pike Place Market. Smiling with that Mary Tyler Moore hat-toss-in-the-air smile. Then the hat falls, hits a tiny little dog who turns and bites Bill Gates, its owner, who lurches towards Avocado in retaliation, screaming about how she's a mac user, too, isn't she?!? Avocado runs - but not real fast - for BG was never known for his athletic prowess - and sure enough, he soon gives up, doubling over, gasping for air - but to be safe, Av (cute nickname, huh?) stows away on the back of the SLUT (the new multimillion dollar streetcar, the South Lake Union Trolley) for the whole 6 blocks of its route. Unfortunately SLU is still being built up, so there's nothing much to do around there besides watch the traffic go by. So Av walks over to the space needle, climbs up to the top with her bare hands (those Omega 3's really are amazing), hangs a bungee swing from the top, and leaps off - swinging back and forth until she stretches WAY out over Puget Sound - and then lets go - and with the velocity ends up landing on Alki beach - which given she's rather ripe is not a hard landing - and she brushes off the sand and walks up the hill to her condo. Where she finds her shadow sitting on the couch, slowly losing brain cells to Project Runway.